what the hell is wrong whith me?

i just dont get it, i have this awfull feeling of sadness inside that no matter what i do say or wathever, it doesnt goes away, i just want to end it, its enough i just cant take it no more, i want it to go away, i just want it to stop, i want to stop feeling fat lonely and sad, but no matter how hard i try i always comes back, i hate it, i dont want to die i want to live!! but happy i wanna feel loved not by my family ´cuz that kinda love is just not enough, im totally lost and i really dont know what 2 do...